My mom likes to tell the story of me as a teeny tot crawling into the laps of perfect strangers in waiting rooms, or flopping myself over, arms outstretched, (making holding onto me darn near impossible) so that the lady in the aisle next to us at the check-out would cuddle me. This being my earliest social interactions, it should therefore come as no surprise to anyone that Setting Boundaries doesn’t come naturally to me. And this topic may just reappear in my aspirations, as it’s certainly not something I’ve mastered.
What I can say I’ve realized is that setting them doesn’t make me cruel, insensitive, selfish, or unreasonable. And sometimes it’s ok to say no and possibly miss out. AND that it does no good to anyone for them not to be clearly defined, right? Like, saying yes and yes and yes and yes until I’m either sick, losing my temper, or feeling completely wilted. That’s not cool.
I’ve found that motherhood helps me to set more reasonable boundaries. Since the parameters for how I operate now directly affect 2 other little lives, it’s easier for me to act in the interest of my family. It’s easier to give a firm No, when I know doing so is in everyone’s best interest. Still, it’s a process for Social Butterfly me.
Today’s piece contains several instances of boundaries: firm, flexible, perceived, tangible, barely visible. And when we combine these starts and stops together, it makes for a pretty nice, harmonious work of art.